The Tohickon Creek release was this past weekend, and it is my favorite creek. It is challenging without being terrifying (most of the time), easily accessible, and a solid class three creek. Yesterday I hit most of my lines that I wanted to, and when I didn’t I was able to avoid the obstacles I didn’t see coming. I even hit my line perfectly at the notorious Second Ledge, which is in my opinion is one of the hardest rapids on the whole river because it’s pretty manky and technically challenging. It is such an amazing feeling when you hit a challenging line just right. This is true in life as well as paddling. You feel like you can conquer anything.
The rapid after Second Ledge is called Race Course, which is tied for first and second place in my opinion with Second Ledge in terms of technically challenging. It is also significantly longer than Second Ledge. I was doing really well, hitting the lines, and cutting when I needed to to make the necessary moves. This was until there was an unexpected obstacle in my normal line. A kayaker who had come out of their boat, which is called swimming. It is not usually a favorable situation to be in, and I have swam Race Course. It is not a fun swim. So I dodged the kayaker, and thought I was good to go. However, I did not see the rather large hole in front of me when I turned. Luckily I was going mostly straight, but did not have enough momentum to push through. And in I went. I learned two things, my drysuit is not dry and I deserve to work on my brace this boating season.
Lower Yough oh crap moment (I did not swim there, but thought it illustrated the moment)
Life is going throw obstacles at you, and some of them pop up like Whac-a-Mole. Unexpected and random. Three things to do in that moment: identify the problem, set-up a solution, and execute. Sometimes those three things need to happen very quickly, like in a rapid or while driving. Other times, you can take a little time setting those things up. You will either come out victorious or you will come out wet (meaning you failed). Crucial part of this: both of those outcomes are perfectly fine. Feeling on top of the world is the best high ever, and instead of living in that moment build on the momentum. Don’t stop for anything. Failure only becomes a mistake when you fail to learn from it. Meaning if I don’t work on my brace when the weather gets warmer, because I will be getting wet from practicing that, than when I flip next time due to no brace, than that becomes a mistake. Choose your poison and evict the word mistake from your vocabulary.
Get Dirty with Change
People say that is change is hard, and it can be. It is also inevitable, and it can be beautiful. It is important to embrace the changes happening in your life because they are coming either way so you might as well embrace it. If the change is unpleasant, the sooner you deal with it, the sooner it will change into something tolerable. If the change is good or long-term beneficial, then embrace the journey to get to the beautiful place on the other side. While paddling I came up with an expression, “on the other side of the mud is often a beauty hidden by the effort to get there.” It is the same with change.
Quite honestly, the catalyst in my growth in the stages of my business has come from outside sources. I do much better historically when helping other people. I am more focused, more determined, and it’s because I genuinely enjoy being a part of helping other people achieving their dream. It’s the part I play, and I play it well. However, it is time to grow out of that. I have written how that is really not enough, but for me it is how I have measured my worth by adding to a cause. As if I am not enough just being me. It’s not true. There are things I am privately passionate about and very important to me that deserves to be heard, known, and acknowledged. These are the ones that only a select few know about, and that scare me for people to know.
Sparking Your Catalyst
All of it is coming to a climax. Tony Robbins says “change happens when the pain of staying the same is bigger than the pain of change.” Everyone has demons, and every person has at least one that likes to linger. A lingering whisper is the fear of not being worthy of the amazing friendships I have built in the last 4 and half years. Which is completely ridiculous, and thankfully doesn’t surface often anymore. It’s the old me popping up like a prairie dog, and the part of myself I deserve to beat whac-a-mole style. Its presence has lessened since I am coming out of a transition period that seems to be inevitably messy. The result is a new level of leadership being born. One that I am ready to take on because staying hidden behind some type of misplaced pride is becoming too uncomfortable to stay idle. It’s like a bug molting into a new shell because it’s outgrown its old one. It’s painful, it’s uncomfortable, and as it happens you are incredibly vulnerable while growing into a new stage of development and waiting for it to harden. It is time to be the catalyst for change and become the adult we are all destined to be.
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